How I became a namer
I knew there was more to life than checking celebrities' noses for boogers. But I didn't know that following my *own* nose would lead me to naming.
Indulge me. It’s the holidays.
The after-school job era
At 15, I got an evenings-and-weekends job at a year-round Halloween costume store in Los Angeles. I was the only employee not related to the owner (who shared a name with a Disney villain) and she yelled at me until I cried almost every single day. I lasted four months.
In search of something “easy,” I got a part-time admin job in the personnel office inside Santa Monica City Hall. This was my first taste of office life, and while I wouldn’t return to it for many years, I liked it. You get to sit down! Occasional birthday cake! Free pens!
The yucky-side-of-Hollywood era
I dropped out of high school after junior year to pursue…I still don’t know. To give the world the impression that I had a plan, I took classes at Santa Monica College and worked the kinds of townie jobs you only get in Los Angeles: entertainment industry jobs.
I worked as an assistant wardrobe stylist on commercials and music videos. If you’ve seen me, in any context, at any moment throughout my adult life, you’d know this was not the role for me. I dress like someone who sleeps on a cot in a garage.
I put in a ton of all-nighters, scrambling to find a red dress that would fit a monkey for Smash Mouth’s “I’m a Believer” music video, checking the noses of the members of 98 Degrees for boogers, and sourcing a cardigan with pockets “good for putting slices of steak into” for a vacuum commercial.
After the stylist I worked for stiffed me on my pay, I got a job as an office assistant at a literary and talent agency. Didn’t love being called “babe” by ultra-tan guys on coke at 10 am. Decided Los Angeles was not going to be my forever home.
After a brief stint in Massachusetts, I moved to New York, and worked for a woman I met late one night at a bar. We ran the distribution operation for a really sketchy DVD-by-mail rental company out of her studio apartment (hey, $9 bucks an hour is $9 bucks an hour).
My copywriting era
Eventually, I made it through college (after attending three of them) with a degree in Spanish, and a certainty I wanted to work with words. I thought I’d end up translating Spanish literature, but I didn’t want to go to grad school yet.
Through Craigslist, I landed a job as an editorial assistant at a food review website. I made $24,000 a year (freelance, no benefits). It really fun to have a job that was writing about chips and sauces, but even living in an extremely cheap punk apartment in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, I wanted to make more money to afford ~life~. (I was also on the verge of discovering I had about 30 food allergies, ranging from mild to life-threatening. At this point in my life, I was barfing ALL the time.)
I managed to get a better-paying job as a copywriter at an appliance catalog. I liked copywriting, but I hated the environment. The "creative team" worked in a windowless hallway, and the wall behind us was shared with the warehouse where all the appliances lived. Twice, the guy who ran the warehouse drove the forklift through the wall behind me, coming inches from pinning me to my desk (I’m not being dramatic). They didn't even let me go home early on those days.
Complaining about the forklift incidents at a party led to me getting a copywriting job at Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia: A woman who would later go on to become a close friend took pity on me and said, “Hey, Martha Stewart just reached out about a job opening. I don’t want to change jobs right now, but maybe I could introduce you?”
Naming, finally
I still don’t know how I convinced them to hire me. Working at Martha Stewart changed my life. I got put in charge of naming the stinky candles that were part of her Kmart line. I didn't even mind that duty—in fact, I loved it. I wasn't having allergic reactions every day. There was no forklift threatening to pierce my spine through an Office Depot desk chair. I could handle sniffing candles, jotting down a bunch of names, and then working with the lawyer to figure out which ones we could move forward with. No prob.
Yes, of COURSE Martha scared the shit out of me. But I finally had health insurance, I'd get free production samples (still have a dutch oven from her Macy’s line in 2006), and I met people who would go on to be incredibly important to me (hello to Kristen Hayes of Superbloom and Elizabeth Talerman of The Nucleus Group).
It’s only in hindsight that I realize that my time there pointed me toward a life I would love: I met people at Martha Stewart who I followed into branding, landing a job as a senior writer at boutique branding agency Ologie (where I got to do even more naming). And if I hadn’t gotten that job, I certainly wouldn’t have found my way to Interbrand, where I eventually took the reins of the naming practice from Rachel Bernard (who had, and continues to have, more impact on how I approach naming than anyone else).
And I certainly never would have had the experience nor the confidence to start my own naming practice without every single moment between those first candle whiffs and walking out the door at Interbrand my final time in early 2016.
This is a very long way to tell you I became a namer by accident. This was the luckiest accident of my life. If you want to become a namer on purpose, I have classes for that! See below.
Happy naming!
Caitlin
Want more naming resources?
Take an upcoming Naming for Everyone class
Download free booklets from the Truth in Branding series on naming and trademarks
You are so gifted at what you do Caitlin. Inspiring in every way!!!